Repentance with Responsibility
In The Name of Allah, The Most Merciful, The Bestower of Mercy.
Imam Abdul Azeez Bin Baz, may Allah have mercy upon him, said:
وشروط التوبة ثلاثة: الندم على الماضي مما فعلت ندمًا صادقًا، والإقلاع من الذنوب، ورفضها وتركها مستقبلًا طاعة لله وتعظيمًا له، والعزم الصادق ألا تعود في تلك الذنوب، هذه أمور لا بد منها.
أولا: الندم على الماضي منك والحزن على ما مضى منك.
الثاني: الإقلاع والترك لهذه الذنوب دقيقها وجليلها.
الثالث: العزم الصادق ألا تعود فيها.
فإن كان عندك حقوق للناس، أموال أو دماء أو أعراض فأدها إليهم، هذا أمر رابع من تمام التوبة، عليك أن تؤدي الحقوق التي للناس؛ إن كان قصاصًا تمكن من القصاص إلا أن يسمحوا بالدية، إن كان مالًا ترد إليهم أموالهم إلا أن يسمحوا، إن كان عرضًا كذلك تكلمت في أعراضهم، واغتبتهم تستسمحهم، وإن كان استسماحهم قد يفضي إلى شر فلا مانع من تركه، ولكن تدعو لهم وتستغفر لهم، وتذكرهم بالخير الذي تعلمه منهم في الأماكن التي ذكرتهم فيها بالسوء، ويكون هذا كفارة لهذا.
The conditions of repentance are three: Truthful remorse for past actions, the cessation of sins, and a commitment to avoid them in the future as an act of obedience to Allah and exaltation of Him. There must be a truthful determination not to return to those sins. These three things are essential.
First, one must regret past deeds and be sorrowful for what has transpired. Second, there must be a complete abandonment of big and small sins. Third, a truthful resolve not to revert to those sins. If you owe people their rights, whether in the form of wealth, blood, or honour, you give them back their rights. This is the fourth matter that would constitute complete repentance. You must return the rights owed to others. It should be carried out if it involves retribution unless they agree to accept compensation. If it pertains to financial matters, you are required to return their property unless they forgo it. If it is to do with honour- if you have violated their honour- and backbit them, you should seek their forgiveness. However, if seeking their forgiveness may lead to further harm, there is no obstacle to refraining from doing so. Instead, you should supplicate for them, ask for Allah’s forgiveness for them, and mention them with the good you know about them in the places (or instances, situations) you (previously) spoke ill of them and this would be an atonement for your actions. [1] [End of quote] Paraphrased
The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “Whoever has wronged his brother, should ask for his pardon (before his death), as (in the Hereafter) there will be neither a Dinar nor a Dirham. (He should secure pardon in this life) before some of his good deeds are taken and paid to his brother, or, if he has done no good deeds, some of the bad deeds of his brother are taken to be loaded on him (in the Hereafter)”. [Al-Bukhari 6534]
Pride’s Mask
In the clan’s fire, we learned: Refusal to bow, to say forgive me, is no sign of strength— It is weakness in armour’s disguise. Pride that clings to self-image Poisons harmony, Turns apology into a battlefield, And truth into shadow. To shift blame is to weave deceit; To feign remorse is to wound deeper. True honour is humble, Strong enough to bend, Brave enough to repent. Victimhood chains the soul, while arrogance blinds the heart. But apology—sincere, unmasked—Is light, A bridge to mercy, a safeguard for the Hereafter.
Al-Haafidh Ibn Hajr, may Allah have mercy upon him, said: “Diverting from the truth and playing tricks to reject it: what is intended is that when one dispute with another person, he employs every way – other than what is legislated in the Shariah – to play tricks until he takes the rights of his opponent, and by way of this he diverts from the straight path”. [Fat-hul Baaree 1/90]
Al-Haafidh Ibn Rajab, may Allah have mercy upon him, said: “If a man has the ability when arguing – whether it is a dispute in religion or a worldly affair – to defend falsehood and make it appear to the listener that what he says is truth, seek to weaken the truth and present it in the image of falsehood, then this is one of the ugliest of forbidden deeds and vilest traits of hypocrisy (in one’s deeds)”. [Jami Al-Uloom Wal Hikam 1/432]
We ask Allah:
اللهم كما حَسَّنْت خَلْقِي فَحَسِّنْ خُلُقِي
“O Allah! Just as You made my external form beautiful, make my character beautiful as well”.
[1]https://binbaz.org.sa/fatwas/20276/%C2%A0%D8%AA%D9%88%D8%AC%D9%8A%D9%87-%D9%86%D8%B5%D9%8A%D8%AD%D8%A9-%D9%81%D9%8A-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%AA%D9%88%D8%A8%D8%A9-%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%89-%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%84%D9%87#:~:text=%D9%88%D8%B4%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%B7%20%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%AA%D9%88%D8%A8%D8%A9%20%D8%AB%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%AB%D8%A9%3A%20%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%86%D8%AF%D9%85%20%D8%B9%D9%84%D9%89,%D9%87%D8%B0%D9%87%20%D8%A3%D9%85%D9%88%D8%B1%20%D9%84%D8%A7%20%D8%A8%D8%AF%20%D9%85%D9%86%D9%87%D8%A7